Island Visitor
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I am in my mid thirties and a mom of two kids. My husband and I are conservative people. We are going to St Barth next year and staying on St Jean Beach. He has mentioned the topless women there. Will there be a lot of topless women? I dont mind that so much but the thought of me doing it is frightening. Do the guys ogle the women or stare? Is it not embarassing?
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Anonymous
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I would guess, based on my experience, that most of the women on the beach or around the pools will be
topless. (I for one leave my bathing suit tops at home) It is the norm. Most folks who go to St. Barts
are use to seeing topless women. Especially the men and women from Europe. Because of this I doubt
you have to worry about someone oggling you. Most will probably not pay that much attention. "When
in Rome" as they say. If you feel comfortable, go for it. After you get use to topless, head down to Saline.
Most there don't wear the bottom halfs of their suits. It is a great experience to spend an entire day at
a lovely beach not having to wear a stitch, or worse yet, sit around in a wet bathing suit.
Americans need to get over this hang-up with their bodies and nudity. We can take a good lesson from the
rest of the world on this issue.
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Island Visitor
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You said that after if I feel comfortable, go for it. I just cant imagine feeling comfortable enough to even try it. The fact that we will be travelling with a small group of close friends we see often makes it even a scarier thought. I guess I am nervous that one of the others may try it. If so, that is fine. I just dont want to be a partypooper but I also dont have the nerve to do it myself. If there are others with tops on at St Jeans then I wont feel out of place. Thanks.
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KenW
Reged: 10/02/02
Posts: 9
Loc: Texas
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The beauty of St. Barts or other European influenced locations is that whatever you want to do is fine. On St. Jean Beach, you'll find equal numbers of topped and topless. Either is just fine. On Saline Beach, you'll see topped, topless, and nude. One is not preferred or recommended over the other. Therefore, there is neither pressure to wear or not wear, nor is there ogling when one chooses to not wear. I say do whatever you feel comfortable with doing and try not to worry at all. I have observed many groups of people (from 2 people on up) where some wear and some don't wear. What you will be comfortable doing could vary with the people you are with, the beach you are on, the number of people nearby, etc. But don't be surprised if you feel a sense of increased comfort with not wearing when you see how the Europeans act -- or don't act I should say. Their comfort and blase' attitude toward toplessness and nudity can rub off on you. Regardless, I can assure you, you will not feel "out of place" whatever you choose. Don't waste another second worrying.
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Island Visitor
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It sounds like we will have a very good time. I appreciate your input.
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Anonymous
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Ken said it well. It would be acceptable to wear a top, not wear a top, or on Saline and Goevenor Beach
not wear anything at all. No one cares either way.
Sometimes is is difficult for Americans to be nude or semi nude around close friends or aquaintances from
home. I would bet that someone in your group will shed their top eventually and probably the rest will join in. But
again, do what is comfortable. Don't feel pressured one way or another.
ps Maybe you and your hubby, or other free spritited members of your group can sneak down to Saline
for a day of skinny dipping in the wonderful carribbean waters. A great, maybe once in a lifetime vacation
experience you don't want to miss. My opinion anyway. Have fun
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Bob
Reged: 10/04/02
Posts: 370
Loc: Southeast Virginia
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My wife, who is older than you (but we'll leave it at that), had the same concerns. On our first visit to Saline she decided to go topless, and she was very comfortable doing that the rest of the week. However, there were women with tops on, and that was a just fine too.
I didn't see any ogling, for what that's worth. It was all very relaxed and a "go with the flow" kind of atmosphere.
Have a good trip!
Bob
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Skateboard Phil
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Couldn't have said it any better than Ken. The nice thing about SBH beaches is that anything is OK. It's a very non judgemental, non oggling scene, different than any American beach. So it is hard for someone who has never been there to understand that tops or topless, clothed or not, everyone is comfortable and doesn't make a big deal out of who is wearing what. As Linda Richman of "Coffee Talk" would say "It's no big woop!"
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Island Visitor
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Appreciate everyone's response on this. Are there other women out there who have had a similar experience to mine (first time, going with group)? Do most go with the flow? Are there any who were curious, tried it and regretted it?
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nickthedog
Reged: 10/04/02
Posts: 275
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Dear Island Visitor,it's SBh and you can do whatever you want to do there. That's what makes it so special. Dress for dinner,don't dress.Suit up for the beach,don't wear a suit.No body cares & you shouldn't either. Have a great trip & don't forget to send those photos in so we can see what all the fuss was about!!
Nick
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Island Visitor
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I am moderately tall and thin. I am not, frankly, as well-endowed as some women including some of the women in our group. And I am self-conscious of this, particularly around those I know. Are all the women on St Barth beauty queens and calender girls?
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nickthedog
Reged: 10/04/02
Posts: 275
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Dear Island Visitor, Who have you been talking to? SBH is full of "just folks".Some might be richer,some thinner,some younger & some older than yourself.Just relax, before you know it all your friends will be saying " I can't beleive see dosn't have a top to that suit"
Nick
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